"The Ballad of the Engineer"
with
apologies to Sergeant Barry Sommers
By Greg
Staskowski MSM
Fighting
manager's from on high
Fearless
soul's, who wonder why?
Technical
folk who don't cover their rears
These
are our brave, young Engineer's..
CHORUS:
Silver
pens upon their chest's
These
are geeks and geekette's
Undergrads,
straight or queer
But
only one in three, an Engineer
Trained
to live, in cubicle land
Trained
in CAD, hand-to-hand
People
who fight, for their career's
Courageous
all, our Engineers!
CHORUS:
At
the condo, a young wife waits
Her
Engineer, is working late
He
must clean up, his boss's mess
Leaving
her, his last request
"Put
silver pens on my son's chest
Make
him one, of the Company's best
To
management, he'll show no fear
Make
him for me, an Engineer"
The Radical
By Robert Vance
ME
Again, again, it
appears again,
When it leaves, we
know not when.
It departs from a
group to be alone,
But likes it not on
its own.
Life is lived when
one is free,
Though not for long
in chemistry.
So, do not cry
hysterical,
For such is the life of a free radical.
Who
killed the Jello?
By Robert
Vance ME
For
somethin’ from the kitchen.
In
the fridge, to my surprise
Floatin’
in the Jello, right before my eyes,
Was
fruit!
I
really don’t know why
But
I wanted to cry.
Who
was the mean fellow?
Who
went and killed the Jello,
The
brute!
I
began to examine this casualty
By
performing a Jello autopsy.
Apples,
bananas, and a pear,
They
were all in there.
Oh
shoot!
By Julie
Richards ME
Having
children scares her.
Terrifies
her.
She
trembles at the thought.
Dirty
clothes and faces and diapers
And
cuts and bruises and scrapes
And
pushing and sweating and nightmares
She
doesn’t want any of this.
But
she must have it.
Her
body tells her
And
her head tells her
And
husbands and
Mothers
and sisters and fathers
And
the neighbors that live
Behind
them in the odd blue house
That
is strangely intriguing.
Determination
over comes her.
Drives
her.
And
suddenly it happens everywhere.
In
the bedroom and the dining room
And
in kitchens and bathrooms
And
in the back of the car
They
borrowed to drive down to
They
haven’t seen
In
ages.
So
then it happens.
The
plus stares at her.
She
sobs.
Everybody
is calling and
Cards
and flowers and balloons
And
presents that are strangely intriguing
Even
though they are lurid in their pinks’ and blues’ and yellows.’
She
becomes everything
All
at once.
And
all against her will.
Care Instructions
If
this scarf had a label it would say,
In
that most peculiar label way,
That
only clean and dry should it ever be.
However,
if it were up to me,
As
for yourself you are about to see,
There
is another way for it may be.
Clean
in a washing machine if you must,
With
water cool and little fuss,
No
softener may you use,
And
bleach also you must loose.
In
a dryer it may not say,
Unless
on low for it to play.
With
an iron cool you may press,
No
more, and certainly no less.
If
to you my words mean aut,
Then
very well have you been taught.
For
years this scarf you can wear,
Without
ever so much as a care,
Of
cold, of sleet, or of snow,
Of
these things you need not know.
For
happy and warm will you be,
As
the world will surely see.
Where did all the “cool” kids go?
There
was a group of students never found
The
most popular peers of freshman year
Have
now disappeared without a sound.
These
were the students that we admire
Handsome,
witty and charming were they
But
in the last year, they’ve not been around
The
cool kids are gone, the world has turned gray.
They
have been drawn to the sea like lemming
From
this new home they will not stray far
They
walk the halls of their prison
A
life sentence they call EGR.
The
major they chose sealed their fate
The
As
juniors and seniors they’ll work through the night
Pale
figures who rarely see sun.
Engineers,
those were the cool kids
I
wish they could come out and play
But
their maternal figure, the library
Says
that they will have to stay.
By Joe Kramer EE
A
Vast
Cloud
S l o w l y
E n g u l f s
The night sky,
A bolt of lightning
Flashes like magnesium
uniting with fir e
Thunder rumbles with its low
bass response to the world
showing no sign of letting
up
The wind blows, trying to get at you
But you are safe and out of
harms way
After many hours, the storm
abruptly
stops, and it
is silent,
the clouds disappear, the
sun
comes o u t f r o m
its nap
and smiles upon us.
The
Art of Engineering
Taken
to the Extreme
With
Math Beyond
What
Reimann
Sums, Taylor Series,
And
Vectors Galoo
Yikes
what will all this come to?
No
artist is solo –
We
work in teams
Building
Slinkys and Spacecraft
There
isn’t anything that we can’t do!
Breaking
barriers and withstanding failure we
Change
the world with products and plasma goo!
Bringing our dreams past all known extremes.
Barb
O’Kelly
Alas,
I've lost that little chip
with
all the files from my Zip!
Bernadette
Friedrich
Engineering at MSU,
Electrical, computer to name a few;
Co-ops, jobs, help from the staff,
Good for your career, good for a laugh!
MSU Engineering, I'm glad I'm in. . .
Now for this poem, what do I
win?
The Radical
By Robert Vance
Again, again, it appears again,
When it leaves, we know not when.
It departs from a group to be alone,
But likes it not on its own.
Life is lived when one is free,
Though not for long in chemistry.
So, do not cry hysterical,
For such is the life of a free radical.
Who
killed the Jello?
For
somethin’ from the kitchen.
In the
fridge, to my surprise
Floatin’
in the Jello, right before my eyes,
Was
fruit!
I
really don’t know why
But
I wanted to cry.
Who
was the mean fellow?
Who
went and killed the Jello,
The
brute!
I
began to examine this casualty
By
performing a Jello autopsy.
Apples,
bananas, and a pear,
They
were all in there.
Oh
shoot!
The cat got a rude introduction
To the blistering effects of conduction;
It felt a bit lame
After licking the
flame,
When its tongue was unable to function.
Brian and Julie Olson
Quicker
Clicker you,
Are
the ultimate pencil
You
make me smarter
Staedler
eraser
Without
you I’d have mistakes
You
take them away
Green
paper, grid lines
An
engineer’s treasured friend
Work
will never end.
Chris Maurice
(MS)Word
Trouble:
i
toil by pixel
light
to make my thoughts form words
programs
crash again
Web
Link:
just
one page is all
i
wanted but instead see
error
404
A
Conversation:
An
engineers peotry shows our versatility,
(They
think that anything they do not do must be easy,)
great
creativity,
(have
the biggest egos,)
and
proves that everything is based on math.
(and
think everyone should learn what they know.)
A
poets engineering exposes their shortcomings
(Why
must engineers take apart everything they touch,)
and
nearly complete lack of...
(and
insist that I not...)
any
mechanical ability.
(call
someone who knows how to fix it right.)
Craig Gunn
Off on the horizon
fingers to the sky…
Pressing palm to palm…
ever reaching further…
Beyond brothers and
sisters
uncles and aunts
and distant cousins.
Each with a prayer in
mind -
The concentrated
thought of
engineers and architects,
builders and visionaries,
day laborers and
passers by.
The monoliths rise,
ever reaching
to
their ultimate creator.
Never gazing to the
earth
beneath
their foundations.
Standing tall, ever
rejoicing in their creators’ dream.
Misdirected bridges.
Thermodynamic Haikus
Thermodynamics
Is all about energy
Work and heat also
First Law of Thermo
Energy change is equal
To heat minus work
Thermo’s Second Law
Universe entropy change
Is always growing
There
was a young, bold engineer,
Thought
nanoperfection was near.
But
his Buckyballs burst
Like
an overstuffed wurst.
How
his tenure committee shed tears!
Young
Ron was deemed structurally sound,
Much
at ease with both Pascal and pound.
His
trouble was tresses,
At
best they were guesses.
With
the shards of those tresses he’s crowned.
--Quintellius Quaesitor
Ode to My Planner
By Amber Rogers
Civil/Environmental
Without
you, where would I be ?
You
are the Who, What, When and Where,
My
very foundation, my guide.
You
are the keeper of my secrets, my questions, my hopes and my plans.
You
have met every aquaintance, every commitment, every connection.
I’ve
entrusted you with all that is important to me,
And
you hold it all close, guard it as your own.
You
have become a living record of me,
My
every word having been etched into your being.
If
ever I am in need of direction, you are there,
Open,
offering your counsel, offering yourself.
You
guide my path, support my ideas, and present me with a daily purpose.
You
ease my mind, set me free of confusion, and organize my thoughts.
Without
you I would be lost in this swirling haze that characterizes my reality.
Without
you, planner, I would be lost.
You
have become an integral component of my life, an essential partner.
We
are intracately linked, joined by the threads, by the bindings that compose the
Pages
of our lives.
By
Barb O’kelly
Alas,
I've lost that little chip
with
all the files from my Zip!
By
Bernadette Friedrich
Engineering at MSU,
Electrical, computer to name a few;
Co-ops, jobs, help from the staff,
Good for your career, good for a laugh!
MSU Engineering, I'm glad I'm in. . .
Now for this poem, what do I win?
The
Worm Before Christmas
By David
Bradley, Betty Cheng, Hal Render, Greg Rogers, and Dan
LaLiberte
Christmas
1988
T'was
the night before finals, and all through the lab
Not
a student was sleeping, not even McNabb.
Their
projects were finished, completed with care
In
hopes that the grades would be easy (and fair).
The
students were wired with caffeine in their veins
While
visions of quals nearly drove them insane.
With
piles of books and a brand new highlighter,
I
had just settled down for another all nighter ---
When
out from our gateways arose such a clatter,
I
sprang from my desk to see what was the matter;
Away
to the console I flew like a flash,
And
logged in as root to fend off a crash.
The
windows displayed on my brand new Sun-3,
Gave
oodles of info --- some in 3-D.
When,
what to my burning red eyes should appear
But
dozens of "nobody" jobs. Oh dear!
With
a blitzkrieg invasion, so virulent and firm,
I
knew in a moment, it was Morris's Worm!
More
rapid than eagles his processes came,
And
they forked and exec'ed and they copied by name:
"Now
Dasher! Now Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen!
On
Comet! On Cupid! On Donner and Blitzen!
To
the sites in .rhosts and host.equiv
Now,
dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
And
then in a twinkling, I heard on the phone,
The
complaints of the users. (Thought I was alone!)
"The
load is too high!" "I can't read my files!"
"I
can't send my mail over miles and miles!"
I
unplugged the net, and was turning around,
When
the worm-ridden system went down with a bound.
I
fretted. I frittered. I sweated. I wept.
Then
finally I core dumped the worm in /tmp.
It
was smart and pervasive, a right jolly old stealth,
And
I laughed, when I saw it, in spite of myself.
A
look at the dump of that invasive thread
Soon
gave me to know we had nothing to dread.
The
next day was slow with no network connections,
For
we wanted no more of those pesky infections.
But
in spite of the news and the noise and the clatter,
Soon
all became normal, as if naught were the matter.
Then
later that month while all were away,
A
virus came calling and then went away.
The
system then told us, when we logged in one night:
"Happy Christmas to all! (You guys aren't so bright.)"
By
Robert Vance
The cat got a rude introduction
To the blistering effects of conduction;
It felt a bit lame
After licking the
flame,
When its tongue was unable to function.
Quicker
Clicker you,
Are
the ultimate pencil
You
make me smarter
Staedler
eraser
Without
you I’d have mistakes
You
take them away
Green
paper, grid lines
An
engineer’s treasured friend
Work
will never end.
By
Bryan Sieber
Engineering
is not much fun
Sometimes I wonder
Why I ever wanted to be one
(MS)Word Trouble:
by Chris Maurice
i toil by pixel
light to make my thoughts form words
programs crash again
Web Link:
just one page is all
i wanted but instead see
error 404
A
Conversation:
by Chris Maurice
An
engineers peotry shows our versatility,
(They
think that anything they do not do must be easy,)
great
creativity,
(have
the biggest egos,)
and
proves that everything is based on math.
(and
think everyone should learn what they know.)
A
poets engineering exposes their shortcomings
(Why
must engineers take apart everything they touch,)
and
nearly complete lack of...
(and
insist that I not...)
any
mechanical ability.
(call
someone who knows how to fix it right.)
By Craig Gunn
Off on the horizon
fingers to the sky…
Pressing palm to
palm…
ever reaching further…
Beyond brothers and
sisters
uncles and aunts
and distant cousins.
Each with a prayer in
mind -
The concentrated
thought of
engineers and architects,
builders and visionaries,
day laborers and
passers by.
The monoliths rise,
ever reaching
to
their ultimate creator.
Never gazing to the
earth
beneath
their foundations.
Standing tall, ever
rejoicing in their creators’ dream.
Misdirected bridges.
Thermodynamic Haikus
Thermodynamics
Is all about energy
Work and heat also
First Law of Thermo
Energy change is equal
To heat minus work
Thermo’s Second Law
Universe entropy change
Is always growing
By Dr.Donald Weinshank
Bob Crachit is
out of work,
outofajob,
unemployed;
broke.
When the Dells came in,
Scrooge said,
“You are consigned
to the dustbin
of data."
Marley’s geist[1] clanked.
There was no third ghost.
Geist = spirit
Second
question
by Gary Cloud
red-gold
hair and green-blue eyes
usually
glowing
pale
and brittle today
My
guts say it will be difficult;
old
professors know
the
second question is the big one.
The
first one is little;
she
used diameter instead of radius.
I
tell her that she obviously understands
and
that she is doing fine.
"No
I'm not...I'm sorry."
choked,
mashing tissue
into
mud puddle eyes
Broken
sobs
broken
heart
broken
person
empathy
stabs
vision
of my children
close
door
wait
"Tell
me?"
"No,
It's personal;
I
do not know you."
"Maybe
that is best.
I
might be able to help,
but
privacy is precious.
Your
call."
"My
life is a mess.
I
don't know what to do."
listen,
wait
fetch
pain
Her
parents just separated
her
period is late
her
boyfriend has taken a hike
all
at once
listen,
ask, wait
eyes
fogged mirrors
She
agrees to visit the counseling center,
but
she might not need it, of course.
a
rickety little laugh
She
promises to stop in every day for awhile
so I
will know she is all right.
She
keeps the promise,
then
reports one day
the
alarm was false,
she
is wiser and stronger,
her
ex-boyfriend is exactly that,
her
parents must lead their own lives.
She
cannot fix them.
Green-blue
eyes glow;
she
is grateful
and
glad.
I also.
By
Gary Gosciak
There
they were the coords
X,
y, z, theta, and phi
A
description need be
Made
in general coords
Should
use x, or maybe z
But
then what's to happen with theta, and phi
Not
biased against y
'Cause
can't use y
for
it does not uniquely specify
where
in the frame is m
the
jth particle of general coords.
By
Gary Gosciak
client/service/users/
a
little anthapomorphic cross referencing
possible
enlightenment background hue
round
together
a
bit of shamanistic representation
a
path of computer/mechanical engineering
All
levels are agents
All
levels are servers
not
All levels are clients
Base
level can only be a server
although
may be a client with regards to itself
there
is the highest most client the one the user
with
its servers below
which
are also clients
requesting
service from the servers comprising its entity
down
to the base
the
root server raw level
that
can only be a client
the
nature of its internal form
All
agents encompass service
but
not all agents are served
in
the agent
is
duality there
the
server and the served
the
base All server comprised of what it serves
bound
by the essence of client
the
peak not just a client, also a server in the image of the One
evolving
in progression by numbers of which can request service
striving
and providing
for
the One, the umbrella, the ontology overhead
the
User
the
ultimate client
the
one wanting to know
the
hunter of knowledge
a
warrior of the domain
ubiquitous
seer of all what is
By
Gary Gosciak
If
it is the case
that
we stay in our place
then
what should be the pace
seem
to be moving to fast
heading
into the future without considering the past
What
we set forth on today
won't
come about tomorrow
just
a picking of the clay
let
our minds play
while
it takes time to cure
sure
it would be nice
to
have the outcome like a rolling of the dice
but
the probability of this possibility
is
silly to say
a
needle in the hay
of
what people want to be tomorrow and not today
only
the whims of yesterday
never
to be the same
when
people play the game
with
the possibility on the probability that we are all in the same
plane
to
see the train
the
bus making its stops for all to board
even
if from a different chord
yet
on a different scale to grow
gotta
keep it slow
no
need to go
keep
it easy
keep
on considering the past
sit
and consider our space
if
it is the case
that
we stay in our place
Beal's
Garden
By
Gary Gosciak
next
to a tree
somewhat
in the center
head
next to its base
melt
into the ground
traveling
around the roots
depths
of earth
make
solid
and
the smells in the air
sweet
beginnings of growth
rooted
firmly with the ground
sprouting
forth into the wind
mixing
with sound
scent
from flowers
shaking
the cold blanket
days
past and expressing noxious potions of comfort
dancing
with rays long journey from the sun
bouncing
around
absorbing
warming light
breeze
spreading along
chattering
grass
passing
life
weaved
through motion
next
to each other connected
touching
the ends of the garden
farther
to home
to
loved ones
gliding
away
riding
the wind
a
bird trailing
the
song mingling
to
sit up with open eyes
lovely
the sights
earthen
body
mind
rooted with what round
hearing
traveling with the sound
balance
above the pool
hands
immersed in cool waters
touching
orange white yellow fish
mouths
open shut
inhale
exhale
returning
to balance
as
understanding dawns upon me brains
night
falls as the days self dies
my
eyes cries
washing
away the stains
residue
of past self
so
many dawns ago
night
falls onto me
Hello,
may I introduce myself
I'm
a man born from my death
would
you care to take my hand
north
a journey we must make
darkness
falls
don't
be afraid
it
doesn't mean we have no sight
down
to the depths the roots we follow of the world tree
walkin
with the dead
talkin
with the dead
you
said the dawn is coming for me
Hello,
may I introduce myself
I'm
a man you've met so many dawns ago
death
has brought me here
may
I take your hand
would you care to dance.
By Gary Gosciak
Just
took a break from not doing work
sat
outside and fell into a daze
found
myself in the middle of a maze
in
and out back and around
flowing
along about and beyond
passing
through live images
of
old past possible scrimmages
who
what where why
finding
it all when up in the sky
connected
back to the ground
through
the trees not making a sound
just
an essence patiently waiting to be found
traveling
to places without any form
coming
to visit old places once existed
making
new acquaintances with places never been a guest
dancing
with a storm
letting
it flow without being resisted
on a journey without any quest...
STARLIGHT
By
Jason Jeffrey
Powerful, yet dim
Too far to feel, yet they are so real
Burning with haze
Their strength strikes with daze
Radiating with light
Obscuring the night
The weave is woven in the starlight
Calling upon the power of mind